Sportsmanship Starts in the Stands
Be the parent your player needs you to be.
Hockey is about so much more than what happens between the whistles.
It’s about confidence. Friendship. Belonging. Resilience. Learning how to win with humility, lose with grace,
work as a team and keep going when things don’t go your way.
And while our players are learning these lessons on the ice, they are learning from us in the stands.
At the Abbotsford Female Hockey Association, we believe that sportsmanship starts in the stands.
Our players should be able to look into the stands and see parents who are encouraging, respectful,
positive and proud — regardless of the score.
The AFHA Hockey Parent Promise
We ask every AFHA parent and spectator to help us create a hockey environment where every girl feels
safe, supported and excited to play.
CHEER FOR THE PLAYER — NOT THE OUTCOME
Your daughter doesn't need another coach in the stands.
She needs her biggest fan.
Cheer for effort. Cheer for courage. Cheer for teamwork. Cheer when she gets back up after falling down.
Cheer when she makes the pass instead of taking the shot. Cheer when she encourages a teammate.
Leave the coaching to the coaches.
Instead of:
“Shoot!”
“Pass it!”
“Get back!”
“What are you doing?”
“You should have...”
Try:
“Great effort!”
“Keep going!”

“Way to battle!”
“Great teamwork!”
“We’re proud of you!”
Hockey Canada encourages parents to emphasize effort and enjoyment rather than placing unrealistic
expectations on young players.
Our Stands. Our Standard.

1. Be Positive
Bring energy. Bring enthusiasm. Bring your voice.
Celebrate the good stuff — not just goals.
Applaud great plays by both teams. Recognize effort. Encourage your own team. Be the kind of fan that
players are happy to hear.
If your comment wouldn't help your player feel confident, don't say it.

2. Respect the Officials
Officials are part of the game — and they are learning too.
They will make mistakes. So will players. So will coaches. That's part of youth sport.
Questioning a call from the stands doesn't change it. Yelling at an official doesn't make the game better.
And our kids don't need to see adults lose their composure.
Respect the call. Respect the official. Model the behaviour we expect from our players.
Hockey Canada notes that abuse is a significant factor in officials leaving the game and encourages parents
to give officials the opportunity to learn and improve.

3. Respect the Other Team
There is no game without an opponent.
We compete hard. We play to win. But we also recognize the effort of the players on the other side of the ice.
Never mock, ridicule, taunt or celebrate another player's mistake or injury.

Cheer for our team.
Don't cheer against theirs.

4. Protect the Player Experience
Remember: this is their hockey experience, not ours.
Your player may make a mistake.
She may miss the net.
She may take a penalty.
She may have a tough game.
She may not get as much ice time as she hoped.
She may lose.
Your job isn't to make the disappointment disappear.
Your job is to make sure she knows that one game, one shift, one mistake or one score doesn't change
how proud you are of her.
Hockey Canada reminds parents that children play because they enjoy the game and that positive
participation and personal development matter more than excellence or outcomes.
The Ride Home Matters
Sometimes the most important part of the game happens after the final buzzer.
Your player may want to talk about the game.
She may not.
Let her lead.
Instead of immediately analyzing the game, try:
“Did you have fun?”

“What was your favourite part?”
“I'm proud of you.”
“I love watching you play.”
And sometimes the best post-game conversation is no conversation at all.
Grab a snack. Turn up the music. Laugh about something completely unrelated to hockey.
Research and youth-sport guidance have highlighted the post-game ride home as an important part of a
young athlete's experience, with parents encouraged to let the athlete guide the conversation.

What We Expect From AFHA Parents
We expect parents and spectators to:

DO

Cheer positively and enthusiastically.
Encourage effort, teamwork and sportsmanship.
Celebrate your player's growth, not just her performance.
Support all players on the team.
Respect opposing players, parents and teams.
Respect coaches and their role.
Respect officials and their decisions.
Keep language appropriate for a youth sporting environment.
Help create an inclusive and welcoming rink.
Model the behaviour you want your daughter to demonstrate.
Speak up appropriately when you see behaviour that doesn't reflect our values.
Remember that mistakes are part of learning.

DON'T

Coach from the stands.
Yell instructions at players.
Criticize or ridicule your own player or another player.
Question a player's effort from the stands.
Argue with or confront officials.
Criticize coaches or coaching decisions during a game.
Taunt opposing players or spectators.
Use profanity, discriminatory, threatening or abusive language.
Make comments about a player's body, appearance or physical ability.
Post negative or inflammatory comments about players, coaches, officials or teams online.
Allow the result of a game to determine your mood — or your child's experience.

Hockey Canada’s spectator Fair Play Code similarly calls for positive comments, respect for officials and opponents, no ridicule of players and no abusive language.
Remember: You're Raising a Player AND a Person
The scoreboard tells us who won the game.
It doesn't tell us who showed courage.
Who encouraged a teammate.
Who kept trying.
Who helped someone up.
Who learned from a mistake.
Who showed respect.
Who became a better teammate.
Those are the wins that last.

At AFHA, we want our players to leave the rink feeling proud of themselves — not worried about whether
they disappointed the adults watching.
We want them to love hockey.
We want them to love being part of a team.
And we want them to know that their worth is never measured by goals, assists, ice time or the final score.

The 10-Second Parent Check
Before you react from the stands, ask yourself:
Is it positive?
Is it respectful?
Is it helpful?

5. Is it my job?
If the answer to any of those is no...
Take a breath.
Let the players play.
Because sportsmanship starts in the stands.